Airplane
‘Night Mum’, I said. ‘Night Sophie, see you in the morning’. I could feel my eyes slowly drooping. I was being swept away. I opened my eyes. There right in front of me was a yellow brick road. Then I heard a noise, it sounded like a violin. I was right, for there right in front of me was a violin being played by a floating yellow monkey, with wings. Then he ate the violin!!! I thought ‘how strange’. Just then an airplane swooped down and as it did my shirt got caught on it and I drifted away.
Wow Grace, this is a wonderful text. I particularly like the way you opened with a dialogue between Mum and Sophie. This is engaging and sets the scene well. The use of a yellow brick road and flying monkeys sounds like it has been inspired by "The Wizard of Oz".
ReplyDeleteHave you included "eaten" in your text. You use "ate". Can you edit your text to include "eaten" instead.